Overcoming fear

The world we live in is becoming a scarier place. Many of the recent news stories have hit too close to home for me: Shootings and violence in schools make me feel that it's no longer safe to be a teacher. A bombing in the state bordering mine, close to where I attended college, gives me a bigger jolt than bombings in other countries have.

Personally, I have been put in many stressful situations as well as witnessed the dramatic circumstances of those close to me. Being a compassionate and sensitive person, I identify with these people's problems, almost as though they were my own.

The anxiety, fear, and panic have been welling up inside of me, sometimes taking over my thoughts, emotions, and physical responses.

I realized that my focus was on the injustices, the dangers, and my own speculations. I was feeling sorry for myself to be living in such a world, and my prayers weren't much more than whining. I had taken on a defeatist mentality.

A friend helped me discover this a while ago, but I re-realized it today: The only reason God has made me so sensitive to the suffering in the world is so that I can bring hope. He has put nothing in my path that He has not equipped me to face.

Soon after this truth became clear to me, this song by Jeremy Camp taken from Psalm 23, 1 John 4, and Psalm 27 came on my playlist.

"...I will fear no evil, for my God is with me..."

God has not given me a spirit of fear (2 Timothy 1:7).

The destiny of my enemies [I am not referring to people, but to troubles and the fear of troubles] is defeat.

My destiny is to be an overcomer.

Yes, bad things happen to good people. But as my fiance said to me, "let us not forget that we are made for eternity and our final destination (God's kingdom)."
  
"And even on the best days He says to remember we're not home yet. So don't get too comfortable 'cause really all we are is just pilgrims passing through" (Long Way Home by Steven Curtis Chapman).

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"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose... What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?...we are more than conquerors through him who loved us." -Romans 8:28,31,37

"Every spirit [including the spirit of fear] that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world. You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. They are from the world and therefore speak from the viewpoint of the world, and the world listens to them." -1 John 4:3-5

This is not a waiting room

This is kind of old news (more than a month old), but...

I'm engaged!

I can't wait to marry Kevin, and it's often hard for me to live in the present moment. (What else is new? Notice a common theme running through my blog?)

I miss Kevin and want to hurry up and start our life together. Marriage is a blessing. It's part of God's plan for my life...

But I have to keep reminding myself that it's not the pinnacle of my life.

It won't make my life complete.

This is not a waiting room. God has things for me to do right now.

I've got a class of 27 students that come to me every day, many in desperate need of someone to love and value them, and to provide structure in their life. Next school year, they will no longer be mine to mold.

I've got coworkers who need a smile and a kind word, not impatience while I wait for the copy machine.

I've got hundreds of people I pass by every day when I'm walking or driving or going to the store. Am I showing Christ to them, or am I just seeing them as an obstacle in the midst of my busy week...the week I'm trying to get through so that the weekend will come and I can see my fiance?

I've also got relationship issues to work through, by the way, so Kevin and I can start our marriage on the right foot.

I know a lot of you struggle to live in the present moment, rather than idealize a future moment.

I don't know what advice to give, but I'm sure many of you could offer words of wisdom. If you have something to share, please comment on my blog or send me an email.

"Life is a succession of moments. To live each one is to succeed." -Corita Kent

Stop waiting for life to be perfect

I recently read a blog post that ties in perfectly with the one I wrote last week. And even though I had already come to a similar realization myself, I was convicted again, and saw the whole thing from a new perspective.

Here are some golden nuggets...

"What we have is time. And what we do is waste it, waiting for those big spectacular moments."

"But this is it: this is as spectacular as it gets, and you have a choice, to be there or not."

"There are no throwaway moments — not when it’s easy, not when it’s hard, not when it’s boring, not when you’re waiting for something to happen.Throw those moments away and you will look back someday, bereft at what you missed, because it’s the good stuff, the best stuff. It’s all there is."

Here's the blog:  http://storylineblog.com/2013/08/14/why-you-should-stop-waiting-for-life-to-be-perfect/?utm_source=buffer&utm_campaign=Buffer&utm_content=buffer4e9ad&utm_medium=twitter

Life is an adventure

I just had my life rocked by a Pixar movie.

My boyfriend and I went to True North church Sunday night, where they are doing a series called "The Gospel According to Pixar". This week's sermon was based on the movie "Up". Amazing movie! The pastor showed us a clip from the beginning (two parts) and the end, and it really preaches for itself.

I was writing down what I was getting out of the sermon, and towards the end of the service, it clicked: Life is not about accomplishing my plans and expectations. It's about making the most of everything that comes my way. I started to cry, because I realized that my life has been so focused on performing. I am always focused on the next task to be completed, and so often, I have missed out on the little moments and the joys that make life worthwhile.



Every day is an adventure. Every moment is for living life to the fullest. I wrote this down in my devotional book today, then turned to the next page to start this week's theme (simplicity), where I read this quote: "Life is a succession of moments. To live each one is to succeed" (Corita Kent). It amazes me how God pieces things together to bring confirmation.

He had given me another aha moment on this same theme years ago. You can read about it in another blog post (The Climb). But I am so conditioned to living life according to my to-do list rather than experiencing the joy, adventure, and fulfillment that can be found in each moment, that I keep needing the lesson reinforced.

"I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God." -Ecclesiastes 3:12-13

Great things going on at my school

I am proud of all my school does for our students and wanted to share a couple of links...

This is a short news video about an annual event at our school called Snowball that gets students thinking about college. There are video clips of students from my class dancing:
http://landing.newsinc.com/shared/video.html?freewheel=91060&sitesection=WTIC_hom_non_fro&VID=24502790

This is an article about our large refugee and immigrant student population. Here's a quote: 

"Kids at Fair Haven School speak Spanish, Arabic, French, Swahili, Turkish, Portuguese, Tigrinya, Kinyarwanda, Kirundi, Mandinka, Dari, Bengali, Russian, Khmer, Polish, Amharic, Chinese and Serbian, as of the latest count. Over half of kids at Fair Haven School are English-language learners. Those who speak Spanish can join one of nine bilingual Spanish classrooms. Those who don’t get mainstreamed with other kids, receive modified instruction inside the classroom, and are pulled out from class for small group instruction in English."

It mostly tells the story of a 6th-grade student at our school who fled an East African refugee camp:
http://www.newhavenindependent.org/index.php/archives/entry/burundi_refugee_fair_haven_school/

Seasons

Much of the Bible seems to contradict itself if you're looking at it on the surface level. But that is because truth is multi-faceted.

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth (Exodus 21:24). Truth: Sin is serious. God is just, and every sin has a consequence.

Turn the other cheek (Matthew 5:38-39). Truth: God is gracious and patient. Jesus has taken the punishment for our sins if we will receive Him. We are called to follow in His example by being gracious and forgiving toward others.

You cannot enter the Kingdom of God unless you receive it like a child (Mark 10:15). Truth: You cannot earn entrance into the Kingdom but must receive it by grace through faith. You must recognize your utter dependence on God.

The Kingdom has been forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it (Matthew 11:12). Truth: Christianity is not passive. It requires commitment, discipline, passion, action.

There are many more examples of apparent contradictions in the Bible, but the point I want to get to is that truth also looks different in different seasons. God doesn't change, but His strategy does adapt to fit the circumstances or the lesson He is teaching us. Sometimes we are to wait and watch Him deliver us, and sometimes we are to get up and fight. Sometimes we are to lean on Him to provide, and sometimes we are to set out fully prepared. Sometimes we are to be gentle and humble, and other times, we are to be bold. I can think of so many instances of these different seasons in the Bible, but I will include just one here, where Jesus is talking to His disciples: “Then Jesus asked them, ‘When I sent you without purse, bag or sandals, did you lack anything?’ ‘Nothing,’ they answered. He said to them, ‘But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one’ " (Luke 22:35-36).

Just because God worked one way in your life before doesn’t mean He will work the same way in this season. Just because He gave you certain instructions in the past doesn’t mean you can continue on as before. Just because He worked a certain way for your friend doesn't mean that's how he's going to make it happen for you. We always have to be open to what He is doing and saying right now, to us. That means constantly seeking His face and laying our own plans and expectations aside. I could give you many stories about the ways I've failed in this area, but I’ll let you inspect your own life. What can you learn from past mistakes? And more importantly, what is God saying to you now?

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." -Ecclesiastes 3:1

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." -Proverbs 3:5-6