Wednesday, July 15, 2015

The late night cornet player (living with love)

I often think about all of the problems in this world - hunger, poverty, oppression, pollution, violence, you name it - and know that as a human being, it is my responsibility to be part of the solution. There are larger than life people in this world who are taking huge steps to end child trafficking, to give the destitute tools they need to live a prosperous life, to introduce sustainable practices for a better future... Compared with them, I feel that I offer so little. Compared with the problems, I feel overwhelmed and don't even know where to begin.

But comparison is a big mistake. It's like looking in a distorted mirror, and it's not going to help me be a better person. Jesus made it simple. He said that the most important thing we can do is to love God and love those around us (Matthew 22:37-40). For some people, that means going to another country and rescuing people from slavery. But for the ordinary person, it relates to how we live each day:

Smile - yours might be the only friendly face someone sees all day.
Be patient - that slow cashier might be having a long, difficult day.
Forgive - that guy who cut you off on the highway might be rushing home to a crisis, or maybe he's dealing with anxiety issues you know nothing about.
Give unsolicited help.
If someone asks you for help, give it ungrudgingly.
Find a person or organization you believe in, and give to them generously - with your time or money.
Reach out to someone who is lonely, or bitter, or unfriendly.

Let me give you an example of the last point. When I moved to a new apartment with my husband after getting married, we noticed that a neighbor somewhere was playing Taps on his trumpet several times each night. At first, we thought it was kind of neat, but then it got annoying, especially when he played at 11 pm and woke us up from our sleep. Through talking with our landlord, we found out that this neighbor did not get along with another neighbor, and he played Taps every night in order to annoy her. After this bit of news, every time our neighbor played, I would seethe inside, asking myself how anyone could be so rude and immature.

However, I've learned that when I have a judgment against someone, if I make an effort to get to know them, I have a better understanding of where they're coming from, and I no longer feel the need to judge. I started feeling like my husband and I needed to go to this man's house and meet him, maybe befriend him. I kept pushing the thought away, but it kept coming back, and eventually I convinced my husband to join me. I made a fruit salad, and we walked to his house and knocked on the door. We were expecting a bitter, somewhat elderly man and his wife.

When the door opened, what we saw was a very old man with long white hair and a long white beard. He invited us in, and we spent at least a half hour talking. It turns out our neighbor is a World War II veteran who was a B-17 pilot. He lives all alone and has trouble finishing a story without losing his train of thought. He is a survivor, not only of the war, but of a stroke and a heart attack. He is bored and lonely, and one of the few things he still knows how to do is play his trumpet (actually, a cornet, as he explained to us). Yes, he does annoy one of our neighbors, and she did take him to court because of it, but I don't believe annoyance is his intention.

We visit our new friend every week or two. Every time we knock on his door, he comes to the window and waves at us, then invites us in with a smile and talks and talks for as long as he can to keep us there. We may not be saving lives, or impacting thousands, but I am encouraged to know that we are making a positive difference in this one person's life.

I'm happy to know that my smile, or kind words, or decision to stop and let the car in front of me merge may be making someone's day a little better. And to know that without people like me making donations, the people and organizations I support wouldn't be able to do the amazing work that they do.

"Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love."
-Mother Teresa

No comments:

Post a Comment